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​Hi! I'm Diane Vallere, and I write humorous mysteries.
If that's what you like to read, then I've got something for you!

My first book, DESIGNER DIRTY LAUNDRY, free!
That may be a slight exaggeration. It's not free, because you'd have to give me your email address for me to send it, and you'll receive some emails from me afterward. So not exactly free, but free-adjacent. 


(If you don't like those terms, I should mention that this month, June 2024, DESIGNER DIRTY LAUNDRY is currently free on all retailers too. So if you like the idea of a humorous mystery but you're not willing to barter your email in exchange for it, then head on over to the ebook retailer of your choice and snag a copy. We're all good.)

BUT BUT BUT!
If you want to find out a little more (including an excerpt) and get an exclusive special offer, then keep on reading!

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Solving crime through style and error.

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Enjoyed by over 370,000 readers! Yours free for a limited time.

“…read everything Vallere writes. Well worth it!”
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Read a Sample
Prefer paperback? Click here
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Only the eBook is free, but you may purchase a paperback right here. 
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She expected the fashion industry to be ruthless. She wasn't prepared for it to turn deadly.

Ready to redesign her life, style expert Samantha Kidd accepts a job in her Pennsylvania hometown as a trend specialist. But her first day goes completely A-line when she stumbles across her legendary boss dead in the elevator. And after the body disappears, she can't help but pull on the mystery's thread and unravel an entire wardrobe of suspects.

​Supervising her deceased employer's vogue competition, Samantha tries to hem in a sexy shoe designer and countless ego-driven creatives to stitch together the clues. But when her own name appears on the police's suspect list, the sleuthing fashionista's days on the catwalk could be numbered.


​Can Samantha put a killer in the spotlight before she's sewn up for a crime she didn't commit?
Enjoyed by over 370,000 readers in 22 countries!
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For your favorite e-Reader!
Where should I send your copy?
Enter your email below and your eBook copy of DESIGNER DIRTY LAUNDRY will show up in moments. 
Thank you!
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Q. Are you a real person?
A. Yes! I've been writing mysteries since 2012 (and reading them my whole life).

Q. If your book is so great, why are you giving it away?
A. Sometimes the best way to know if you'll like something is to try it out first. If you enjoy this book, you may go on to buy other books from me. I've written over forty, so you'll have options!

Q. I'm not into clothes. Do you only write about fashion?
A. I currently write six different series: fashion, decorating, fabric, costume shop, outer space, and mermaids. (and the mermaids don't wear clothes, so I guess the answer is no :))

Q. Is there any bad language, sex, or violence in these books? 

A. If these books were made into a movie, they would be PG-13. 

Q. Can I get this book in paperback form?
A. Only the eBook is free, but you may buy the (discounted) paperback here.

Q. Can I read it on my Kindle/Kobo/Nook/iPad/iPhone/Android/Galaxy/Google Pixel/Microsoft Surface/etc.?
A. Yes! You can read it on the eReader of your choice. 
Psssst! You made it all the way down here and haven't signed up yet? What are you waiting for? Oh, you're waiting for details about that special offer I mentioned all the way up there. You're technically not supposed to see it until after you type in your email address, but I can see you're a discerning reader, so I'm going to reward you for reading all the way through this page. Get the special offer here. 
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